You got the feeling that some day, someone somewhere was going to get a kicking from Villarreal.
Last night Tenerife didHe says Floyd Mayweather is a "pretty boy", Flavia Pennetta is "my girl", and Usain Bolt is "crazyyyy".
He thinks Roger Federer is "da man" but in fact da man is him.
Well, it is this weekend, at least; it is this weekend, at last.
This weekend, Villarreal's Giuseppe Rossi is the man.
The man who got "robbed" by Manchester United, prompting Arrigo Sacchi to write to Alex Ferguson about fair play (like he cares); the man who supported Milan as a kid because they had a "sick" team and seemed to have joined them this summer only for their website to remove the story five minutes later; the man who last night became the highest-scoring Italian ever in La Liga*, overtaking the legendary Christian Vieri - Pichichi with Atlético Madrid in 1997-98.Highest-scoring Italian-American, that is.
Because just as the Australia-born Vieri had journalists scratching their heads and looking blank when he responded to a question about his boyhood hero with a blunt "Allan Border", Rossi thinks nothing of staying up all night to watch his team: the New York Yankees.
Born and raised in Teaneck, New Jersey, his favourite football club are the New York Giants.
But while Jay-Z fan Rossi is as much U-S-A! U-S-A! as he is Bel Paese, that didn't stop him playing for Italy, the country he always insisted on representing.
Or joining Parma at 13, heading for Old Trafford at 17 and signing for Villarreal for €10m in 2007 - where, quick, clever and skilful, he has impressed ever since.
Where he has now broken an Italian record.It gets better, too - because not only did Rossi's shot slip beneath Sergio Aragoneses to take him a goal above Vieri, it also made him the club's top scorer this season.
No wonder he celebrated, fists pumping, screaming: "Come on!"Only the truth is the record is not quite as good as it sounds.
There haven't been many Italians in Spain - a country that, in footballing terms, can't help sneering at those cynical, boring, dirty cheats from across the Alps - and while Vieri got his 24 league goals in a solitary season, it has taken Rossi two and a quarter to reach 25.
While he has been a consistent scorer, he is yet to be the club's top marksman - last year it was Joseba Llorente, the year before that Nihat Kahveci.
And while he went to the top of the club's goalscoring charts on Sunday, so too did Nilmar.
And Cani.
And Robert Pirès.
And Llorente.
As for Santi Cazorla, he was already there.On two.Which is pretty much the point.
It is also why you could understand Rossi's reaction - one that screamed relief as much as delight.
It might have been the third in what was ultimately a thumping 5-0 victory, with Llorente getting the first and the fourth, Pirès getting the second and Cani rounding it off.
It might have come against Tenerife, the only club who have to change time zones every time they travel and who have lost all five games away, scoring just one and conceding 15.
As both coaches admitted, it might have flattered Villarreal.
And it might have been a relatively straightforward finish.
But it mattered.
Really mattered.
To Rossi and his team.
After all, as Marca put it, yesterday Villarreal and goals had some making up to do.It was the kind of making-up that had the Ronettes crooning and it needed to be.
After six successive seasons finishing in the top eight, two trips to the Champions League, and signing their most expensive-ever player, the Brazilian Nilmar for €12m, Villarreal went into this weekend's match in the relegation zone, where they had been for six long weeks.
New coach Ernesto Valverde was under pressure and the players - who enjoy a closer relationship with him than they did with Manuel Pellegrini - felt it.Sure, they'd picked up their first win of the season last weekend but they'd struggled to secure the 2-1 victory over bottom-placed Málaga.
They had scored just seven goals in eight games.
David Villa had scored as many on his own.
They had four extremely talented strikers - Rossi, Nilmar, Llorente and Jonathan Pereira - but between them they'd scored just twice.
Rossi in particular looked anxious.
A man who "hates losing", he snatched at chances.
The keener he was to score, the less likely scoring became; the tunnel vision kicked in and so, it appeared, did the nerves.
It's not like he wasn't getting chances.
It's not like Villarreal weren't.In fact, they were getting loads of them.
With Pellegrini departing for Real Madrid after five superb seasons, Villarreal have struggled to adapt to a new system.
Valverde has broken from their slow, possession-focused South American style to play with more intensity and greater width but five-year habits die hard and it's not quite working.
Centre-back Gonzalo Rodríguez, normally so imposing, has been dreadful.
Goalkeeper Diego Lpez has become suddenly erratic.
Marcos Senna, the one player who has no replacement in an otherwise impressive squad, is 33 and starting to look it.
Pirès is brilliant but he is also 36.
And Cazorla, the side's most important creative spark, has been struggling with a slipped disc that, doctors announced last week, will keep him out indefinitely.
But most of all it's hard to avoid the oddly dissatisfying but ultimately true conclusion that, actually, Villarreal's dreadful start to the season was mainly down to bad luck, to wasted chances.Against Athletic Bilbao, they were hammered; against Madrid three days later, they lost having conceded a brilliant second-minute goal from Cristiano Ronaldo and been down to 10 men for an hour, Kaká eventually adding a penalty.
But in every other match, they'd had more shots than their opponents.
In fact, in every other match, they were more impressive than in their two wins.
"All the luck they were missing before arrived today," Tenerife coach José Luis Oltra sighed last night.That's some luck.
Against Osasuna, AS's headline declared "[the Osasuna keeper] Ricardo rescues a point"; against Deportivo, kings of the 1-0, the home side "suffered until the end" as countless chances went begging, admitted El País; against Espanyol, Marca's match report declared "the opportunities kept arriving for Villarreal; the goals did not".
Against Xérez they gifted two ludicrous goals - one of them preceded by a handball.
And against Mallorca it was just silly: Villarreal battered them, went a goal up and then a biblical downpour left the pitch so wet it was a wonder there weren't signs up kindly asking patrons to refrain from pushing, ducking and petting.
"A gift fell from the sky for Mallorca," admitted AS after a skidding, fluky free-kick got them an undeserved draw.You got the feeling that some day, someone somewhere was going to get a kicking.
Last night they did; last night, what had to happen finally happened.
A baseball-loving New Yorker overtook a cricket-mad Sydneysider and Villarreal overtook Atlético Madrid to climb out the relegation zone and get their season started at last.* Rossi has also scored more La Liga goals than anyone from the USA, too.Talking points• Out! Out! Out! Pep out! A 93rd minute own goal from Gerard Piqué, after another balls-up from the frankly not that good any more Rafa Márquez, gifted Osasuna a draw on Saturday night.
Barcelona have now dropped points in their last two away matches and lost to Rubin Kazan in the Champions league (who they visit again this week).
They are just one point clear of "crisis-ridden" Real Madrid.• Speaking of which, Madrid beat Getafe 2-0 at the Bernabéu with two goals from Gonzalo Higuaín - the man some people still seem to think isn't good enough.
With Kaká behind the front two and Raúl on the bench, there was something a bit more logical about Madrid's set up.
But once again they needed a feeling of injustice to really get them going: a very, very harsh red card for Raúl Albiol, which turned the fan's anger from players to official and suddenly created a communion that was previously missing.
The referee deemed it a clear goalscoring opportunity but failed to notice a few things: the ball was in the air and far from under control, there was another defender near by, and it was Roberto Soldado.
AS's obsession with the "Villarato" is getting more pathetic by the day.• Álvaro Negredo does it again.
Lovely goal.
Sevilla weren't great but they did win.
As for Xerez, they're doomed, doomed, doomed.
Doomed, I tells ya.• What was that about new coach guaranteed victory? Last week Atlético Madrid blew it in the 93rd minute against nine men under stand-in manager Santi Denia.
This week, under Quique Sánchez Flores, they lost again and are in the relegation zone.
That said, they do look tighter defensively and they were desperately unlucky - twice they hit the post.
Things look better for them.
Or at least they would if it wasn't for the fact that next up they face Real Madrid (after Chelsea, pedants).
And we all know what happens when they play …• Pennant watch: Oh dear.
Off injured after 25 minutes.
Probably still saw more of the ball than he did last week, mind.• Eight thousand Sporting Gijn fans made the trip to La Coruña.
If only other clubs could cotton on to the idea.Results: Real Madrid 2-0 Getafe, Osasuna 0-0 Barcelona, Xerez 0-2 Sevilla, Athletic 1-0 Atlético, Villarreal 5-0 Tenerife, Espanyol 1-1 Valladolid, Mallorca 1-0 Racing, Zaragoza 2-1 Almería, Málaga 0-1 Valencia, Deportivo 1-1 SportingClick here for the latest La Liga table
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